Thursday, July 31, 2008
I went back and the binoculars were GONE!
I met the hygenist. You know all the prep work it takes to get paint off an old house to get ready for a new coat of paint? Sometimes you can pressure wash. Sometimes they sand blast. And sometimes it just takes getting in there with a putty knife and scraping all that old gunk off the walls. Yep - that what I feel like. And she went down to the foundation! My mouth is SO sore. (I had soup for dinner.) But the ol'choppers look pretty good.
Still have the filling to look forward to, but I have a week or so to prepare myself. Meanwhile, she gave me a whole BAG of things to improve my brushing and glossing performances. It was like trick AND treat. She made my mouth bleed and then bribed me off with new tooth toys. And I will never be able to identify the culpret. They have a pretty good thing going on there.
It seems that others have shared my frustration with the qulaity of the real estate listing photos. There is a site that show bad and FUNNY attempts at advertising a home for sale. I was looking through it today snickering and chuckling all the while. Check it out!
We Oregonians put up with the rainfall in the fall, winter and spring so we can enjoy the Oregon summers. It takes all that rain to keep the green that is so beautiful.
Our deal with God is that summer is a payoff for nine months of rain, wind and gloom. We look forward the sun and warmer temperatures in the summer. As soon as the temperature gets above 59 degrees, we are out on our bikes, shorts, and sandals. Here is Monday's sunset.
Here is Tuesday's sunset. Hey - I thought we had a deal!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
So - given the title of this posting you can assume that pain came and I succumbed to making an appointment. And you would be right. Part of what I don't like about dentists' office is the furniture and equipment. Where else can you go where the chair lays you out prone with this tower of equipment - and spotlights - over your face? the people are okay, if you ignore the fact they approach you in a MASK and rubber gloves. No eye witness identification and no finger prints. That makes me feel relaxed and at ease.
Given the fact that I am almost 60, why would they put me in a room with THIS?
Okay, I MIGHT have been a little "child-like." But my big "ba-boom" (Cayden-ese for tush) will NOT fit on that seat. Mr. Tooth is not my friend. But the really scary thing was THIS - hanging right next to the lead apron they cover you with for x-rays.
Just HOW FAR into my mouth were they going to LOOK??
The outcome was much better than the prior anxiety. I had a female dentist - YEA! She complimented the care I was taking of my teeth! YEA! I sat there, KNOWING how irregularly I really brush (though I floss a lot)and lied through my somehow amazing teeth. As I mentioned before, I have really good teeth - thank goodness. Otherwise they would have rotted out of my mouth years ago. Now it seems I have tooth fairies coming in and cleaning up the tartar while I sleep. YEA!
For the lack of time I spend on them, I have really been blessed. Maybe I need to be more attentive and appreciative. Tomorrow I get them cleaned. Now, if there is a vaccuum in that examining room.....
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Life is never dull with Cayden around. His totally enchanting smile disarms you when you want to discipline him. How can you stay tough with a little guy who takes your hand and looks up saying, "Die Dove Do, Am-Ma"? (I love you, Grandma) He has a speech problem is going to speech therapy now and is getting better all the time. I treasure his little mispronunciations because I know they won't always be there and are something to be treasured while I have them. Right now, he starts most words with "D". Uncle Scott is "Duncle Dott." Grandpa is "OOm-Pa." He pats my ample stomach and says with a big smile, "Do Dat" (You fat) The funniest thing that happened this weekend was that while playing with Grandpa, Cayden looked down and saw a hair from Grandpa's beard in his hands. He raises his eyebrows and says "Ah-oh..." and gets this stricken-look on his face. I can only imagine what he was thinking. Did he think that Grandpa was unraveling? Had he broken something? Did he think Grandpa was going to mad at him? You could tell whatever the outcome, he didn't think it was going to be good.
We did the tourist things - went tide-pooling, visited lighthouses,
went to the under sea garden
and Ripley's "Believe It Or Not" museum. We went to Devil's Churn, Devil's Punch Bowl,
Cape Perpetua, , Sea Lion Caves. But the best part was playing games together.
It's something we all like to do and don't always get to do. This time they brought a board game called "Ticket to Ride - Europe." It was so addicting. It reminded me of Risk AND Monopoly - in ways. Great game - check it out!
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
I believe we all understood that by coming to earth, we would be exposed to all of the experiences of earth life, including the not-so-pleasant trials of pain, suffering, hopelessness, sin, and death. There would be opposition and adversity. And if that was all we knew about the plan, I doubt if any of us would have embraced it, rejoicing, “That’s what I have always wanted—pain, suffering, hopelessness, sin, and death.” But it all came into focus, and it became acceptable, even desirable, when an Elder Brother stepped forward and offered that He would go down and make it all right. Out of pain and suffering He would bring peace. Out of hopelessness He would bring hope. Out of transgression He would bring repentance and forgiveness. Out of death He would bring the resurrection of lives. And with that explanation and most generous offer, each and every one of us concluded, “I can do that. That is a risk worth taking.” And so we chose...
There are few of us, if any, who don’t walk the refiner’s fire of adversity and despair, sometimes known to others but for many quietly hidden and privately endured. Most of the heartache, pain, and suffering we would not choose today. But we did choose. We chose when we could see the complete plan. We chose when we had a clear vision of the Savior’s rescue of us. And if our faith and understanding were as clear today as it was when we first made that choice, I believe we would choose again.
Therefore, perhaps the challenge is to have the kind of faith during the hard times that we exercised when we first chose. The kind of faith that turns questioning and even anger into acknowledging the power, blessings, and hope that can come only from Him who is the source of all power, blessings, and hope. The kind of faith that brings the knowledge and assurances that all that we experience is part of the gospel plan and that for the righteous, all that appears wrong will eventually be made right. The peace and understanding to endure with dignity and clarity of purpose can be the sweet reward. This kind of faith can help us to see the good, even when life’s path seems to be layered only with thorns, thistles, and craggy rocks.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
We put it just above our bed. We found a wooden hanger at WalMart and it goes with the paneling so well. It suits our room perfectly. How did you know, Ericka?
She even changed the fish from a trout to bass coloring for Tom! You can see the feathery lure in it's mouth. So Cool! She does GREAT work. Everyone wants her to get their name at Christmas!
You Can Definitely Spot a Liar
Maybe you have good instincts. Or maybe you just have a lot of experience with liars.
Either way, it's pretty hard for someone to pull a fast one on you. You're like a human lie detector.
What Your Feet Say About You:
You are pretty average in your expressiveness. You can express yourself well, but you don't always want to.
You are a very passionate person. You are highly charged and easily inspired.
You are an assertive and aggressive person. You are determined and not likely to ever give up.
You take a while to fall in love, but once you do, you stay pretty attached to your partner.
You are not afraid of anything. You are brave and courageous, even when most people would be terrified.
You are intellectual and philosophical. You are more concerned with thoughts than action.
You are an amazingly hard worker. You aren't spoiled and you don't mind getting your hands dirty.
You are not easily influenced by other people. You hold your ground and are true to your beliefs.
Monday, July 21, 2008
I am NOT making this up! I'm not sure I'm ready for this - but it's got my imagination going...
Here's the link
Saturday, July 19, 2008
I used to live in the Mojave Desert. It is described as a "high desert." It sets on the east side of the San Gabriel Mountains, which means that any moisture the clouds are carrying is forced out on the west side as the clouds gain altitude. It's called a precipitation shadow desert.
We moved at the beginning of summer. In the "high desert," there is sort of a monsoon season. The temperature is very high (usual more than 110 degrees)and the moisture laiden clouds go overhead. The humidity rises and you have a condition that you don't expect to have in a DESERT. It's muggy and miserable. The clouds form into HUGE formations, billowing thousands of feet in the sky. They were accompanying by thunderstorms with wonderful lightening displays. Sunsets were beautiful.
When I was still a desert "newbee," I was talking to a neighbor who had lived in the desert all her life. We were watching the clouds roll and lightening lighting them up from the inside. They were dark, huge, and towered over the valley we were looking out across. I asked, "Do you think we will get any of that?" I was thinking that it looked like rain. She looked at me. She looked back at the clouds and then back to me. Her answer was brilliant. "Why do you think it is a desert out there?" I laughed and laughed.
Why do we do that some times? Ignore the obvious. Deny natural laws in favor of our own faulty logic. Bill Engval should have been there. He would have given me my "Stupid" sign.
The city I work for just started a new fiscal year. My department got TWO brand new work trucks. Now, anyone who knows me knows I have always wanted a truck, but never had one. My dream vehicle is a 1956 Ford pick-up. A couple years ago we decided we needed a new rig and I was set on a Toyota Tundra club-cab. I wanted a six cylinder. But, when it came to purchasing, we got a Nissan Altima. I have come to love the Altima, but had not given up the dream of the Tundra.
Then came the gas crisis. Nearly $5 a gallon. Kiss the Tundra good-bye. I figured that was the end of that.
So - the new trucks arrive at work. What are they? Toyota Tundra crew-cabs! Deluxe! How cool is that?? I get to drive the truck I love! But I don't have to buy it or refuel it. Does God know how to give good gifts?!! Conquecidence? I chose to see it as a blessing. To me it is another little sign between Him and me. Things at home aren't too fun, but I am doing my best. I'm doing the right things. How sweet to let the Toyota Tundra be the lowest bid when the city of looking for trucks. Who would ever imagine THAT!
Suddenly the early morning pump station circuit doesn't seem so dreary! I'm riding in style. Thank you, Heavenly Father! I love you, too!
Newport News-Times: Posted: Jul 18, 2008 - 07:26:10 PDTOf course, all this brought out all my co-workers "bear stories" at lunch yesterday. Two of them have friends who raise hunting dogs. They have gone out with them when they hunted bears with the dogs. Some scary stuff. I guess training a dog to hunt bigger game - bears and cougars - can bring in some really good money - IF you are good at it. Quite an interesting lunch-time.
Problem bears killed in Florence, Yachats
An aggressive bear broke into this attached garage north of Yachats looking for food. Wildlife officials are attempting to catch the bear. (Courtesy photo)
Human feeding of bears and a suspected poor berry crop are blamed for the worst-ever year for bear damage in the Florence and Yachats area in memory.
Within the past week, six bears have been killed in the Florence and Yachats areas, bringing the year's total to 12.
Four of the bears were public safety risks due to their behavior. One broke through a kitchen window looking for food, and another charged - growling and snarling - into a backyard toward a homeowner. The other two bears killed tried to break into the same goat pen where a goat was killed last week.
All bears killed were repeatedly seen in the daytime, and did not show wariness of people, indicating they had come to associate people with food and were now habituated. While attacks are rare, habituated bears are often the ones involved in attacks on people.
Friday, July 18, 2008
If Life Is A Bowl Of Cherries, What Am I Doing In The Pits?) She begins:
“You don’t love me!” How many times have your kids laid that one on you?
Then she goes on to tell what the reply would be if she ever blurted it out.
I loved you enough to bug you about where you were going, with whom, and what time you would get home.
I loved you enough to insist that you buy a bike with your own money, that we could afford and you couldn’t.
I loved you enough to be silent and let you discover on your own, that your hand-picked friend was a creep.
I loved you enough to make you return that candy bar with a bite already out of it, to the drugstore and confess, “I stole this.”
I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours while you cleaned your bedroom; a job that would have taken me no more than fifteen minutes.
I loved you enough to say, “Yes, go ahead and go.” when you wanted to go to Disney World on Mothers’ Day.
I loved you enough to let you see the anger, see the disappointment, see the disgust and see the tears in my eyes.
I loved you enough not to make excuses for your bad manners and your lack of respect.
I loved you enough to ignore “what every other mother” did or said or permitted.
I loved you enough to let you stumble, to fall, to hurt and to fail.
I loved you enough to let you take responsibility for, and live with, the consequences of your own actions, at age six, age ten, age sixteen.
I loved you enough to shove you off my lap, to let go of your hand, to be mute in the face of your pleadings, so that you had to stand alone.
But most of all, I loved you enough to say “no” when you hated me for it. That was the hardest part of all.
To all the Mom's - hang in there. You're doing the right things! You won't see the rewards of your efforts for a long time, but you WILL see it. And it will be worth it.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Noah was a drunk
Abraham was too old
Isaac was a daydreamer
Jacob was a liar
Leah was ugly
Joseph was abused
Moses had a stuttering problem
Gideon was afraid
Samson had long hair and was a womanizer
Rahab was a prostitute
Jeremiah and Timothy were too young
David had an affair and was a murderer
Elijah was suicidal
Isaiah preached naked
Jonah ran from God
Naomi was a widow
Job went bankrupt
Peter denied Christ
The Disciples fell asleep while praying
Martha worried about everything
The Samaritan woman was divorced, more than once
Zaccheus was too small
Paul was too religious
Timothy had an ulcer….
AND Lazarus was DEAD!
Now! No more excuses! God can use you to your full potential. Besides you aren't the message, you are just the messenger. In the Circle of God's love, God's waiting to use your full potential.
Have you ever told anyone you were okay when you really weren't?
Sure, and they believed me.
Who was the last person to call you?
My oldest daughter. We talk every day.
What are you looking forward to?
Having my kids visit from Utah!
Do you consider yourself spoiled?
Used to be, not so much now. Have to work on that….
Did you sing today?
I’ve barely even spoken.
When's the last time you cried?
Ever given it all to someone who walked away?
More times than I wish were true.
Quote by Mae West: “I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.”
What is one thing you miss about your past?
Playing with my kids.
Do you miss anyone?
I miss lots of people – every day.
Who do you trust the most?
The Lord, then my hubby.
What color is your hair?
I’ve become quite “roan.” Auburn and gray
Are you too forgiving?
Now this is something I have NEVER accomplished – wish It were true.
Olive Garden is?
Too far away – we’re talking about a two hour drive. We live on the edge of the world.
Do you have trust issues?
Is the Pope Catholic? Boy, howdy…
Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
I wish the sun were out – it’s foggy.
Don’t want to go to work.
Does anyone hate you for no reason?
Don’t think so – I’m SURE I gave them good reasons.
Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
Absolutely. And I’m grateful that I can’t. There are events in my past I would change forever, BUT they made me what I am today. I wouldn’t change that. Past events shape our present and character. Not crazy about how it happened, but am pretty happy with how it turned out.
Who made you laugh today?
My son. It’s his birthday and I called him. Talking to him always makes me happy.
Are you lonely?
A little. I’m in a weird place. I’m not sure what I am feeling. I’m kind of in neutral.
One thing you would change?
I’d change my mom – she would be cured of Alzheimer’s.
Who was the last person you gave up on?
I don’t give up on people. I turn them over to the Lord. He can handle ANY body!
If you could pack up and move, would you?
Bite your tongue! I’m not even totally UN-packed….
When was the last time you laughed really hard?
Along time – I miss that. It was my hubby and I in the car and I had to pull over because we were laughing so hard. We were feeding off each other. I’d just look at him and start laughing all over again. And him too. It was great!
Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?
I can think of at least a dozen places – and most would be to see someone I miss. Alaska would be just for me.
Has anyone ever told you lately that they would always be there for you?
My hubby doesn’t have to say it. He does it. Over and over. I’m lucky. Others HAVE said it and not done it.
Does anyone like you?
Gosh, I hope so.
Are your parents divorced?
Yep – since I was eighteen months old. Mom remarried when I was 18 and my step-dad died eight years ago.
Do you fall for people easily?
“Fall”? Not a chance. I don’t give my friendships easily.
Do you love people easily?
Once you are in my heart, it’s forever. I don’t give friendships easily, but once I commit, it’s for always.
Would you ever get a tattoo?
Nope. Never even tempted.
What's your mood?
BLAH. Just woke up.
Where were you an hour ago?
In bed, sleeping.
If you took a drug test would you pass it?
It would come back clean.
Did you enjoy your weekend?
Which one? I remember a weekend I enjoyed, it just wasn’t this month.
When's the last time you ran?
I barely WALK!
Do you like your first name?
I do now. I liked my middle name better when I was younger, so I gave it to my youngest daughter. I wouldn’t give any one else my first name. I like that my first and middle names means “little Christian.”
Are you jealous of anyone right now?
~ Margaret Meade once said, "Jealousy doesn't prove how much you love someone; it proves how insecure you are." I like that quote. It’s true. And I HAVE struggled with jealousy.
Do you regret doing something today?
Maybe getting out of bed…..
Last person you told a secret to?
If I’m told a secret, I don’t tell anyone. It’s a secret. If I HAVE a secret, I don’t tell anyone because I want it to STAY a secret. I told you I have trust issues….
Whats irritating you right now?
That I only have five hours before I have to go to work, and I have about eight hours of things to do.
Is there anyone that you hate?
Honestly, no. I’ve worked hard at this. Holding grudges is like eating rat poison and expecting the rats to die. The only person you are hurting is yourself.
When you're walking, do you stop to drink?
No. I’m lucky enough to be walking. If I stop, I’m done.
Do you believe that if you want something bad enough you'll get it?
Yes. But you have to be careful what you ask for. You might get it. I’ve always had prayers answered, and but sometimes realized I was praying for the WRONG thing. Now I always include, “thy will be done.” I trust Him.
Kill or be killed?
I would lay down my life for my family and would lay down another’s life if they were jeopardizing their safety.
Break someone’s heart or have your heart broken?
As far as I know, I’m usually the one whose heart gets broken.
Who was the last person you hugged?
My hubby, this morning.
What would you do if you opened up your front door to a dead body?
Check for ID – it might be mine.
Done anything you regret so far in life?
As I mentioned before – I regret a lot. But I also believe that everything happens for a purpose. I choose to trust the Lord. My mom has a saying, “If He brings you to it; He will bring you through it.” I wish I could have learned certain lessons differently, but I’m grateful for the lessons.
Are you thinking of someone right now?
~ Every single day.
What are you about to do?
Go down and check on Mom. Eat breakfast. Clean the guest room for my kids! (Smile)
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
B- Best Friend? My Hubby. Don't really have any girl friends. I always got along better with guys and getting married really cut down on my "friend base."
C- Cake or pie? Pie! Pecan, Peach
D- Day of choice? Sundays - absolutely.
E- Essential Item? I originally said my computer, but actually, I think it's my scriptures. How's that for a turn-around, kids???
F- Favorite Color? Blue and green, like where I live.
G- Gummy Bears or Worms? Worms, totally. And I go with Ericka, sour are the best!
H- Hometown? I consider Lenexa, KS my home town. Actually born in Kansas City, MO, but lived in Lenexa until I was seven or eight. Moved to CA and lived there the longest. Would never claim it as home. Have no desire to even visit it again. Like my kids, I love Oregon. Wish I had lived here all my life.
I- Favorite Indulgence? Tillamook Chocolate Peanut Butter or Rocky Road Ice cream, with pretzels.
J- January or July? Can't choose. Have kids born in both months.
K- Kids? I have four - girl, boy, girl, girl - natural kids. Tom has one son. Together we have "adopted" one daughter, emotionally. There are several others that we wish were ours and have "adopted," as well.
L- Life isn't complete without? My husband and my children and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
M- Marriage date? Which one? 11-27-1976 (to my kid's dad); 2-14-93 (to my sweet Tom); and Sept 28, 1998 (to Tom, again. Yeah - it's a long story...
N- Number of brothers and sisters? I actually have a half-brother that I met only once, about 30 years ago. I always wished I had grown up with siblings.
O- Oranges or Apples? I love both, but I am crazy about Cara Cara Oranges! Apples? If I could always eat them fresh off the tree, I'd never eat anything else. We get REALLY good ones here in the Pacific Northwest.
P- Phobia and fears? I'm scared of heights and maybe rats. Have discovered that I am a little claustrophobic
Q- Quote? "No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave." — Calvin Coolidge
R- Reason to smile? Every time I see God's hand in my life - which
S- Season of choice? Spring! I LOVE the flowers of spring. And it means winter is OVER!
T- Tag three people? I tagged my girls - Ericka, Chrissy, Samara, Emily and Heather
U- Unknown fact about me? I can't remember what I wrote last time. I would like to travel around in an RV and see all the places I've always wanted to go. I think there must be gypsy blood in me somewhere. I LOVE to travel.
V- Vegetable? Broccoli, corn-on-the-cob, asparagus, artichokes. I don't think I have ever met a veggie I didn't like!
W- Worst habit? Worrying about stuff and then eating to feel better
X- Ray or Ultrasound? Don't really care.
Y- Your favorite food? THAI! Positively. Am really addicted to fresh mangoes and sticky rice - YUM!
Z- Zodiac sign? Pisces!
We used to live in California and they had lots of drive-by shootings, and snipers taking potshots at freeway (highway) drivers. It was a scary place. What if I had to worry about that here? What might the dangers look like here?
Here are some ideas:
I think I need some sleep. I'm getting paranoid....
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Diverse and adaptable
You enjoy the full buffet of life
It's hard to you play favorites with friends... or flavors
There's very little that you dislike!
What Your Fridge Says About You
You like to be surrounded by things you love. You aren't exactly greedy, but you can be materialistic at times.
You are a very thrifty person. You don't like to waste money... or food.
You are a very adventurous person. You love to try new things, and you get bored very easily.
You are responsible, together, and mature. You act like an adult, even when you don't feel like it.
You are likely to be married - and very busy.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
The lesson today was on Alma 23-29. We ended up talking mostly about the Anti-Nephi-Lehi's Lots of class participation today, which was good. Didn't cover all the reading but more people talking is good. We talked about what conversion REALLY is, how it doesn't always happen immediately.
I found excepts of a church pamphlet that I included in my handout:
True to the Faith: A Gospel Reference
by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
Certain qualities characterize those who are “converted unto the Lord.”
They desire to do good. King Benjamin’s people declared, ‘The Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, … has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually” (Mosiah 5:2). Alma spoke of people who “could not look upon sin save it were with abhorrence’ (Alma 13:12).
They do not rebel against the Lord. Mormon told of a group of Lamanites who had been wicked and bloodthirsty but who were “converted unto the Lord” (Alma 23:6). These people changed their name to the Anti-Nephi-Lehies and ‘became a righteous people; they did lay down the weapons of their rebellion, that they did not fight against God any more, neither against any of their brethren’ (Alma 23:7).
“They share the gospel. Enos, Alma the Elder, Alma the Younger, the sons of Mosiah, Amulek, and Zeezrom dedicated themselves to preaching the gospel after they became converted to the Lord (see Enos 1:26; Mosiah 18:1; Mosiah 27:32-37; Alma 10:1-12; Alma 15:12).
They are filled with love. After the resurrected Savior visited the people in the Americas, ‘the people were all converted unto the Lord, upon all the face of the land, both Nephites and Lamanites, and there were no contentions and disputations among them, and every man did deal justly one with another. . . And it came to pass that there was no contention in the land, because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people. And there were no envyings, nor strifes, nor tumults, nor whoredoms, nor lyings, nor murders, nor any manner of lasciviousness; and surely there could not be a happier people among all the people who had been created by the hand of God. There were no robbers, nor murderers, neither were there Lamanites, nor any manner of -ites; but they were in one, the children of Christ, and heirs to the kingdom of God’ (4 Nephi 1:2, 4 Nephi 1:15-17).”
Friday, July 11, 2008
This is one of the things I LOVE about being on the coast. It is one of my favorite things. It doesn't happen every month, but the moon is setting at the right time this month and there aren't any clouds to block it. I didn't take these pictures. I don't have a night time photo option on my camera, like my daughter does. I did a Google search and picked a couple that looked most like what I saw on my way home tonight. Moonlight on the ocean is just beautiful! It lights the waves and make a whole beacon of light back out to sea. A silver highway to the horizon. Very romantic.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
My brain hasn’t been working on all eight cylinders (it’s an old, high-octane brain) for several weeks now. Watching my mom’s decline scares me into thinking that I might have early Alzheimer’s too. More likely is that I just have a lot on my plate right now (plate? Heck, I need a platter!) Found that I am experiencing at least three of the things that make ADHD worse.
Trying to do multiple things at once just isn’t a skill I have any more. How every did I ever handle having four kids in six years? How did I balance having school-aged kids in three different schools (elementary, middle and high school) and get them all delivered and picked up? Mostly the lapses come on annoying stuff, but yesterday I really messed up at work.
I had several things going on. ( I should KNOW now that this never turns out well…) It was the last day of open enrollment for my insurance for this fiscal year. Naturally, I couldn't find my enrollment forms. I probably laid them down and you know what happens from there…the “I-just-had-it-a-minute-ago” fairies came in and poof! I don't have a clue where to find it.
My wonderful payroll lady emailed the forms and (you are never going to believe THIS…) gave me her HOME phone number in case I had any problems with the process! (I work swing shift. She works day shift) I didn't have to call, but it felt good to know I COULD.
The enrollment “quiz” for the health insurance was twelve (count them – 12) pages long on-line. They wanted to know the last time I chewed a hangnail, and how often I had done that in the past six month. (Well, maybe not THAT, but everything else!) It took time. You can't complete the enrollment process without the quiz. What a crock! If you answered yes to anything, a window dropped down with two or three MORE questions on it. Damn you, Bill Gates!
I also had some water samples to process. We are doing a storm drain study for the city and culturing the samples to see if there is any cross-contamination in the storm drain lines. (There is.) They have been making repairs as we investigate. But, I had ten new samples to culture and put into the incubator. In addition to that, I was monitoring the equipment (well – this is the whole point of the story) in another building. (But not very well…)
I finished the cultures and glanced at the computer monitor for the other building’s equipment and saw that the temperature was VERY high. Too high. I dashed out of the lab and started for my truck. Coming out of the storage doors of the other building was BIG, white, billowing clouds, of what looked like smoke. I thought I had created a fire. I just stood there like I had grown roots! A thousand things were running through my mind. I wish I had a picture of my face. All I could think was, “I am SO screwed…”
Turns out it was not smoke. It was quick-lime dust. We use quick lime as a stabilizing ingredient in our process. The material it usually mixes with had stopped flowing. So the conveyor belt was cascading dry lime dust off a fifteen foot drop. I mean it was EVERY where. I couldn't see through the building to the door open on the other side. It was BAD. I grabbed a mask, got the blowers on, shutdown the equipment. I was totally alone. It is 10 PM. I didn't know how bad the damage really was, but I knew it wasn’t good.. I wanted to sit down and cry, but I just didn't have time for that. I did what I could to minimize the situation. I wrote a note to my lead operator basically saying – It’s bad. I did it. What time is the firing squad? And went home.
Going in today was hard. I didn't know what to expect. Turns out the equipment was fine. The guys did everything they could to make me feel better. They told me mistakes they had made. Assured me that it could have happened to anyone. It turned out better than my worries ever imagined. I just have remember that “multi-tasking” isn't a good idea right now. All my wires aren't hooked up correctly. (my oil is probably a quart low, too!)
Mood today – relieved. Celebrated with Sushi!
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Don't you love it when something you've been fretting over and gnawing at suddenly gets SO simple?!! I call those sudden moments of clarity - lighting bolts. I just had one.
The answer is something I already knew, but had forgotten. Again.
I am going through a new phase in my life. Lots of things have changed in the past six months, cumulating in us moving into my mother's home to be caregivers. I have made posts about these things and whined and cried about different changes. I ranted about feeling out of control. Every time a new "change" comes along, it's like rubbing salt in raw skin; I'm SO sensitive to it. I don't like change. Feeling out of control. Facing the unknown. Hello? OF COURSE, I'm going to feel that way. I am going through a NEW phase in my life!
I had forgotten my foundation of faith. The Lord loves me. He wants to bless me. He choses better for me than I chose for myself. GOD is in control. HE knows exactly where I am going and what I have to learn. The lessons I will get will give me EXACTLY what I need to be more valient and a better servant. I NEVER am in control! WHY do I have so much trouble "getting" that??? Instead of "kicking against the pricks," I need to spend more time on my knees. I KNOW where wisdom comes from - and it's certainly NOT my little brain!
I made a decision a couple of years ago. During "hard times" I was not going to ask "why me?" I was not going to second guess prior inspiration. I was going to be GRATEFUL. I would express my trust in His guidance. I don't see anything wrong in sharing your feelings with Him. I do because I know He knows ME. I am always straight-arrow with Him.
There have been times when I really hated what was happening. I have told the Lord that I was really uncomfortable with how things were going, but that I trusted Him. I was sticking it out and I knew He had a plan. I couldn't see how anything good could come from what was going on, but I trusted Him. He loves us and wants to bless us. I have had some wonderful witnesses of that love.
So - guess what? I'm there again. On the edge between faith and the unknown. He has a plan and I don't NEED to know what it is. I know enough. HE is in control and I am happy with that.
A Trip to Holland
by Emily Perl
When you're going to have a baby, it's like you're planning a vacation to Italy. You're all excited. You get a whole bunch of guidebooks, you learn a few phrases in Italian so you can get around, and then it comes time to pack your bags and head for the airport--for Italy.
Only when you land, the airline attendant says, "Welcome to Holland."
You look at one another in disbelief and shock, saying, "Holland? What are you talking about? I signed up for Italy!"
But they explain there's been a change of plans, and you've landed in Holland, and there you must stay. "But I don't know anything about Holland! I don't want to stay," you say.
But you do stay. You go out and buy some new guidebooks, you learn some new phrases and you meet people you never knew existed. The important thing is that you are not in Italy, but neither are you in some filthy, plague-infested slum full of pestilence and famine. You are simply in a different place than you had planned.
It's slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy, but after you've been there a little while and have had a chance to catch your breath, you begin to discover that Holland has windmills. Holland has tulips. Holland has Rembrandts.
But everyone else you know is busy coming and going from Italy. They're all bragging about what a great time they had there and for the rest of your life you will say, "Yes, that's what I had planned."
The pain of that will never, ever go away.
You have to accept the pain, because the loss of that dream, the loss of the plan, is a very, very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you will never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.
Monday, July 7, 2008
This is what it looks like from the doorway. You can't see the files and drawers. I still have some of craft stuff. What would I do without something to occupy my hands?.
Here's how we set up the bed. It's not perfect, but it's okay for now. The will be changes as we settle in.
The closet works great. It fits the room well. I can't wait until we get the baskets from Ikea to finish the inside.
Here's our view from the desk. Chrissy - do you recognise what is hanging in the window? I have to get new flowers to put in it.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Thursday, July 3, 2008
I talked to Emily yesterday morning. The short and dirty version is that she isn't coming this time either. She is going to have the baby there. It all has to do with being able to get Pablo out of the country, which they can't do until he has a Venezuelan passport in addition to his American one. He has dual-citizenship and has to abide by BOTH country's rules and regulations. Realizing who is in command down there, you can have an idea of what kind of hoops they have to jump through to get out. It seems like they have to play musical chairs. They are told to do one thing or go someplace and that will solve their problem. They DO that and go back with what whatever paperwork they were told was required, only to be find out what they have isn't acceptable. Then they get another "scavenger hunt" list of documents or requirements, and off they go again. In the course of trying to fulfill the vacuous requirements, costs are involved. Large, ridiculous sums that has no realistic comparison to what they can earn down there. Each wild goose chase costs money, yet achieves nothing. How frustrating is THAT!
It just got to me yesterday. I can't even tell you my initial reaction when Em aid she wouldn't be coming. I was just kind of numb the rest of the day. Felt kind of disassociated. That night at work, while doing the lab tests, I just started crying and couldn't stop. I thought all kinds of weird things. Like, Roberto was brain-washing her and holding her hostage in the god-forsaken country. I felt like I was never going to see her again in my life. It was like when she disappeared in2000, all over again. I feel so out of touch. So powerless and out of control. I just wanted to get a passport, jump on a plane and go down there and DRAG her out of that place.
About then a little voice in my head said, "And who made YOU Redeemer of the world? What happened to relying on Heavenly Father? Why is it up to YOU how this works out?"
Today I read Chrissy's blog and I felt that way all over again. Another situation where someone I love is in danger. Their freedom and peace controlled by some nut. Their safety and even their very life in jeopardy because someone' ego needs more fuel. There is this wave of guilt that rushes over me. I SHOULD be able to protect them. I SHOULD be able to rescue them. I want to rush in and carry them out - of ANY danger. ALWAYS. But it's just not in my control - there are nuts out there.
The lesson we all learned from 9-11-2001 was that tomorrow isn't promised to ANY of us. Because someone has a grudge, or wants a little attention, or thinks they can make a statement with unknown strangers' lives - the short mortal time we have to share with our friends and family could be over in a heartbeat.
Being LDS gives me great blessings in this area. I'm grateful that I KNOW the Plan of Salvation is true. I'm GRATEFUL for my faith. I couldn't face daily life in these days without that knowledge. Though I know I will have my loved ones for eternity, it's making it through the remainder of my mortality WITHOUT them that I dread. I have separation issues, okay? Death is a pretty permanent separation.
I'm done, I think.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Today all the hanging lights were removed and the intersection looks like any you might drive through in any city.
We even have a left turn lane. They widen the street, making it four lanes, all through the main strip. They took out the "suicide" center lane. I'm not sure how I feel about it. A lot of changes.