Maybe it's all the years of HAVING to get ready for school. First myself. Then the kids. Fall makes me trunky. I wrote a poem about it once - compared the feeling to the urge to "migrate." I see all the school supplies on sale and I want to buy them. I have a serious stationary obsession. I found that out when I moved. Fall makes it worse. I'm SURE I need more of those cute little composition books - like the one I bought last year. That are still unscathed on my shelf. Maybe not.
I think it's all the excitement of starting a new school year. Some people get all excited about New Years. Starting the school year does it for me. I want to go places. Do things. Learn new things. I want to quit my job (oops, that just slipped out).
I can still remember one school year that my mom took me school clothes shopping. Back then, girls HAD to wear dresses to school. So, there wasn't much mixing and matching. We went to this one store that actually had several really cute dresses. Money was always tight and I was resigned to that. I tried on dresses and narrowed down my choices to four I really liked. Of course, my limit to purchase was three. I remember agonizing over which one to put back. I tired them all on again - and then a miracle! My mom said I could have ALL FOUR! I still remember the feeling of euphoria I felt. I felt like a princess with an enormous wardrobe! I felt rich! I felt pretty! All at the same time.
I also still remember what the lunch closet smelled like when I was in first grade. We had to put our lunch boxes on a shelf until lunch time. I remember walking in and smelling peanut butter sandwiches and bananas. This was before plastic wrap and baggies. Everything was wrapped in wax paper. The bread in your sandwich would dry out before you got to eat it. The smells weren't contained. It was wonderful.
School shopping was such a heady experience when I was little. It was almost like Christmas. All these new things. Getting to see all your friends that you had missed over the summer. A new lunchbox. New shoes. Everyone excited to show off what they had gotten. I remember thinking my dress HAD to be the prettiest of any of my friends on my way the first day. Can you remember picking out what you would wear that first day? Spacing out new things to make the newness last longer.
As a mom, school shopping was an entirely different experience. I was always stressed about money. Trying to find the sizes we needed. Making sure I didn't favor one child over another. Trying to find bargains when they wanted brand names. Never being able to do all I wanted, the way I wanted. I know Ericka is having difficulties with it this year. It's a mom thing.
Fall brings up desires for change in me. I've moved three in the last eight years in the fall. I moved to Stanfield, we moved to the 2nd St. Helens' house, and we moved back to Waldport - all in the fall. I never put that together before. Hmmm.
2 comments:
This year school starting is making me sad. I've been seeing it as an end to things! End of Olympics, end of summer, end of swimming, end of sun, end of outdoor fun! Now the rains will be coming and it'll get colder and darker. And I feel we never really had much of a summer, as far as the weather is concerned. But with school starting, we are starting new routines again.
The school break that made me feel that way was when we were in Yreka. It was the Christmas break the year that Matt got that role-playing board game. We played it all day, sometimes. Didn't even get dressed. I had SO much fun with you guys those two weeks. When school started again after Christmas, I cried that whole morning. I didn't want school to start.
I feel lke you do about winter coming and I want to call 2008 "The Year Without a Summer." Weird weather and we are already starting to get rain storms. I think we have Seasonal Adjustment Disorder (SAD). Maybe we should try tanning this winter. I've heard it really helps. And we will have to do some research on enclosed places to go for recreation. Being the Pacific Northwest, I'm sure they exist. We will find them.
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